Learning Love Through Travel in Milan

“The bird who dares to fall is the bird who learns to fly”

Paris is always a connection

Gratitude for opportunity

“The bird who dares to fall is the bird who learns to fly

Milano: the supreme, urban city where fashion and design encompass the locals and command the tourists.  The known prestige made me hesitant. Neither David or I are materialistic and often opt for simplicity, so the concern of being overwhelmed into a labyrinth of Mykonos all over again was understandable. I had even suggested to potentially stop at non tourist/local city instead, but ultimately we decided to book our flight and hostel stay in Milano as our final destination of the trip. 

Upon arrival, there was a calmer tone to the city compared to the other tourist areas of Italy that seemed much more structured and scheduled. In general, there seemed like there was an appreciation for waiting or intention for walking. As usual upon arrival, we meandered our way to the hostel admiring the quietness of the streets and poise of each building. The “Yellow Square Milan” offered a luxury hostel experience. The common space connected by restaurant, café, bar, workspace, and community with what looked like University students exchanging personalities. 

The hostel room wall displayed a large painting with a bird and quoted “The bird who dares to fall is the bird who learns to fly”. It was difficult to hide my tears at something that seemed simple, but felt personal. Just 2.5 weeks prior to this Europe trip, I experienced some difficult life changes that were still in process for me. The bird comforted me as such a wonderful reminder that the best opportunity was still coming, but I would have to endure some pain first. 

We headed out for some late afternoon/night exploring. I feel that every time we visit a large city, we underestimate distance. Simply walking a new city is, by far, one of my favorite things to do. I love to submerge into the architecture, daily pedestrians, and city scapes, but I feel notorious for incorrectly guessing how much walking to do. We probably spent a good 45 minutes trying to navigate to the Duomo while cross checking street signs to our phone map. There was not as much anticipation as concern when we passed numerous shops and restaurants that looked like they have not opened since pre-covid.  Part of me wondered if Milano hadn’t reflected back to tourism yet, until we arrived at Duomo di Milano (Milano Cathedral). The grand Cathedral stood grounded in pride within Duomo Square next to Vittorio Emanuele II. We joined other younger appearing University students and young locals for Aperol Spritzs at a little bar called ‘Motta’ located just next to the Cathedral. I would say we definitely got lucky because there was a line when we had first passed and lines at the various other drinking establishments surrounding the Duomo. Milan felt very young with so many people enjoying the company of others on a Sunday night whether what looked like romantic partners, friends, co workers. 

The travel exhaustion motivated us to find a Metro entrance to which now felt like a breeze compared to Paris. Milan seemed to have had more levels to the Metro though which did turn us around a couple times. Arriving back at the hostel, we enjoyed a couple more drinks in the downstairs club. We climbed down the steps of the hostel to hear Disney’s Mulan “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” in a different language sang by a group of young, elated travelers. Such an iconic song that seemed to harness the inner strength of many across the world. In the club, we met a few other travelers including many solo European travelers on University Spring Break. We finished our night to Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” and Queen’s “We Are the Champions” which feel very overplayed in America, but still are all time favorites among young Europeans. 

Paris is always a connection

The following morning, we had our final day ahead of us to explore Milan. We went down to the common space to enjoy breakfast. There was another younger gentleman that sat in the table next to us that seemed to be solo traveling. David commented asking about the Paris Disneyland bag at his feet considering David had been interested in visiting when we were in Paris. That kind man ended up being one of the most gentlest and beautiful humans we had met. We surprisingly spent the next few hours connecting with him about so many things including our experience growing up in America and his experience in Venezuela then moving to Croatia. We had shared and connected so much over love for others. For a morning we had contemplated just grabbing a croissant to go, but instead taking time to enjoy the time was rewarded with such a wonderful connection at breakfast. 

We knew we were fitting a lot into a little amount of time while in Europe, but we also knew this was our only opportunity for some time and we had to take it. We knew we would still be missing out on so much while taking in so much, but what we found in Milan was special. 

The afternoon we had separated from our new friend with plans to meet again in some hours for Gelato before his flight. We found ourselves on the search for water as always come to surprise that there was not as many waterways in Milano. We did find one water view called the Grand Canal in the Navigli District just a simple few Metro rides away in the Southern area of Milano. The canal was lined with street vendors and small little restaurants as much of Europe has perfected. We strolled along it slowing out pace in the sun to forget that it was much chillier than Malta especially in the shade. 

One thing that surprised me was a quick experience in a restaurant. We entered into the tented front to be told that we needed a reservation to a surprise. It was Monday midday and there were maybe 30%, if generous, of the tables filled. Ironically, I had just been admiring that with David that very little eateries had required reservations in much of Europe. It is one of my pet peeves from living in America and constantly having to have reservations making it impossible to visit. Personally, I see it as an inefficient and lack of purposeful concept. Not more than two doors down, we found another restaurant that ended up being so fitting for us. We had one of the most delightful lunches with wine bottles on the wall with little lights and plants. The most beautiful part was the large glass bottles on the counters around the open kitchen that illuminated with light. To my surprise this lunch felt paced; David and I recollected on our dreams of living Europe and changes I was personally going through. For an entire eleven day trip with four countries, it seemed that everyday we were taking every moment we could to immerse in the culture, but this day was one to allow every minute to pace with gratitude. 

We enjoyed a couple cappuccinos in the sun next to a canal which still has me conflicted. I had heard much of Italy does not consume cappuccinos in the afternoon, but there seemed like a large amount of coffee lovers that happily indulged. 

We slowly meandered back to Duomo to meet with our breakfast friend. He shared about his experience in the Cathedral as we set off on the exploration for “authentic” gelato. Doing research about Italy you hear about the food in tourist areas that isn’t authentic and, of course, Gelato must be in the cold tins in the counter rather than piled on top. I had hoped at some point someone would give us chainmail and half coconuts to click together as the sound of hooves on the cobblestone streets on the search for this Holy Grail of Gelato. Love a good Monty Python reflection. We easily looped the entire Duomo square peeking around every corner looking for Gelato stands, but failing to even locate even a “non-authentic” Gelato.  Luckily, we finally crawled at the door step of Venchi e Chocolate Gelato for a perfect dessert treat to share wit promise to reconnect when David and I return back to Europe in hope of potentially Croatia. 

Our final part of our Milan was a last minute booking at QC Termemilano in Porta Romana which was minutes from our hostel, Yellowsquare. It seemed very on theme for us considering the what seems like 22 honeymoons we already have been on, for us to go to a luxury spa/bathhouse. What a package to begin with wine and small plates of snacks before heading to the numerous hot tubs outside under the Milan night sky. The building consisted of numerous other saunas of different temperatures as well as a relaxation room. This room had multiple cushions on the floor and a small hut with red heat lamps with different rotations of nature sounds like storm and rainforest. There were couples entangled in each other feeling every second of their breath. Such a highly recommended romantic experience whether with yourself or with your partner or partners. 

Gratitude for opportunity

I could not be more thankful for David to advocate for the time in Milano as well as breakfast at the hostel and beginning conversations with other travelers. It is something he continues to teach me no matter the continent we are on. That every communication with strangers is the opportunity for valuable connection. Being a very independent person consistently questioning the intentions of others, I am so grateful to be reminded of the possibilities.

Milano offers gratitude for opportunity; Opportunity for closure, beginnings, connections, and appreciation. 

Learning Love Through Travel in Malta

If a lizard waves at you, you know you are in love

Walking with each other to places we can’t get to on our own

Appreciate the Unexpected – You never know when the Pope is going to cut you off on the way to the airport 

This was the lizard that waved to us!

If a lizard waves at you, you know you are in love

We got up ready to really see Malta. We first stopped in a very touristy shop next to our hostel that was selling cute bucket hats. I was like Kait this is what I was talking about for upping your hat game. And she looked divine in it. As we were walking away I realized I needed one too and also got Kait a boobs lighter. She needed that.  We started walking  the other way down to Belluga Bay and found a nice Cuban restaurant overlooking the water for breakfast. Half a cappuccino in we see this lizard approaching our table from the Northeast. We both had been counting the number of lizards we saw as we hiked the Cinque Terre so we were like hey look its our first Maltese lizard. Lizard number 1. Then as we leaned in towards Lizard number 1 it began to wave at us. Like, literally lifted up one paw (?) and waved back and forth. A lizard was waving at us. Lizard number 1 was currently waving at us.  And we were at breakfast! Only one cappuccino deep I swear!!! It was the kind of thing that if you witnessed it alone you would have rubbed your eyes and went “Naw that didn’t happen”. But it did happen. Both Kait and I saw it. 4 eyeballs wide open. Each of us leaned in a little bit in awe of what we were seeing. So, you gotta hand it to Malta for being the most welcoming place on earth if they have lizards that wave at you. 

When we got up from that breakfast we knew we were going to have a great day because, look people, a lizard had just waved at us. If that ain’t good luck I don’t know what is. 

Walking with each other to places we can’t get to on our own

The sun was high in the sky and it was actually hot out. Kait and I began to meander along the coast line walking slowly with each other along the expansive coastline of Malta. We stopped for a drink or snack here and there and found pretty spots to sit and look out over the ocean. It truly is the simple things that are the most joyful. When you slow down and truly notice the beauty around you it is a reminder that the best things in life are free. Feeling the warmth of the sun on my face, the freshness of the air, and the energy in my heart from being in a new place that invigorated my senses in every way. We found one spot where the water came in to a cove and laid down to soak in the sun. Within probably about 45 minutes we got toasted, like burnt. That Maltese Sun is real warm folks…just what Kait and I were looking for with our pale bodies. We spent the majority of the day just wandering around the coastline and enjoying a treat every now and then. It was a delicious way to enjoy the sunny day. 

Appreciate the Unexpected! – you never know when the Pope is going to cut you off on the way to the airport

We got up early and instead of going out to get breakfast decided to just head to the airport early as my parents would have wished we did. Because who knows when the Pope is going to cut you off as you try to get to the airport. Our taxi was actually stopped for almost 30 minutes as the Pope made his way to his private jet. For Real!!!  And everyone got out of their cars to take pictures so the traffic was not clearing any time soon. We finally go to the airport only 2.5 hours early 🙂 It was an Air Malta flight and even though we both were already terrified of flying more than ever the flight was pretty smooth. We both agreed that Malta had its thang – one, very friendly lizards, two, the best weather, and three, a very vibrant multicultural vibe. We would love to visit Malta again in the future.

I just want to close this piece by reiterating the objective fact that a maltese lizard waved at us.

Learning Love Through Travel in Venice

Love deepens through awareness

Allow your mishaps to make other plans for you

Watch the way of rain when it falls slow and free

Love deepens through awareness

One thing that we learned in Venice was to be ready for anything as we walked around the canals. We had multiple people put up their umbrellas millimeters away from my nose, stop on a dime and turn around completely to go the other way around the canal, and even one sneeze I narrowly avoided.  In a city that pretty much met my predictions I had in terms of its unique grandeur while being very touristy, I found that I was paying more attention to the ways in which people can be unpredictable. As my awareness of my expectation changed to not expect people to walk all the same at the same pace and make a turn signal noise when they were going to change directions, I was able to avoid getting my nose taken off by a fast opening umbrella, to avoid a complete chest bump with a stranger as they make a split-second decision to do a 180 degree turn, and avoid the much dreaded stranger sneeze in your face.  It reminded me that love asks of us to increasingly deepen our awareness and expect the unexpected of the mystery of every moment – not just of myself, but of Kait, and of our surroundings.  As awareness deepens it gives us clarity to love the bigger picture of reality and empowers us to change what we are now aware of or to change our relationship to that focus of awareness. As Darwin has Darwin’d, “Attention if sudden and close, graduates into surprise; and this into astonishment; and this into stupefied amazement.” All I know is that I am now attentive to how that quote uses a lot of punctuation and that love deepens through awareness.

Allow your mishaps to make other plans for you

So we tried to go to Murano, and we ended up at Lido. We had the idea to take one of the Venice ferries out to get some dinner and see the glass blowing we had heard about on the island of Murano. It all was going well until after many stops it looked like we had crossed from the main island out to the island we saw on the map. Without double checking, we got off the ferry and walked onto what we thought was Murano. Pretty quickly we realized we were on Lido. With a quick guffaw, we went to find some dinner. I loved how quickly both Kait and I were up for the adventure of exploring somewhere different than we had intended and embracing a mistake as an opportunity to explore somewhere we may not have gone to if we didn’t try not to go there. You know what I mean?!  It seems like a good idea in travel to let go of the plans you had when your mishaps make other plans for you. It sure was fun when we embraced that 🙂 

Watch the way of rain when it falls slow and free

It was raining the whole time we were in Venice. And at that point in our trip we had been as the kids say “doing too much.” The classic temptation of an American Euro trip is to try to pack in too much into a short trip because travel in Europe is so easy. So, the rain really slowed us down literally and we found ourselves haphazardly under the Rialto bridge sipping some drinks. We did not know it was the Rialto bridge at the time, it just started pouring rain and we needed a quick refuge, and it just so happened that there was a cave-like cafe nestled up to the edge of the bridge that looked cozy with a pristine view. After seeing so many other people stop and take a picture in front of the bridge we thought this must be something. The rain slowed us down and we watched the way of rain as it fell “slow and free.” 

For One Who Is Exhausted, a Blessing

By: John O’Donohue

When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,

Time takes on the strain until it breaks;

Then all the unattended stress falls in

On the mind like an endless, increasing weight.

The light in the mind becomes dim.

Things you could take in your stride before

Now become laborsome events of will.

Weariness invades your spirit.

Gravity begins falling inside you,

Dragging down every bone.

The tide you never valued has gone out.

And you are marooned on unsure ground.

Something within you has closed down;

And you cannot push yourself back to life.

You have been forced to enter empty time.

The desire that drove you has relinquished.

There is nothing else to do now but rest

And patiently learn to receive the self

You have forsaken in the race of days.

At first your thinking will darken

And sadness take over like listless weather.

The flow of unwept tears will frighten you.

You have traveled too fast over false ground;

Now your soul has come to take you back.

Take refuge in your senses, open up

To all the small miracles you rushed through.

Become inclined to watch the way of rain

When it falls slow and free.

Imitate the habit of twilight,

Taking time to open the well of color

That fostered the brightness of day.

Draw alongside the silence of stone

Until its calmness can claim you.

Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Stay clear of those vexed in spirit.

Learn to linger around someone of ease

Who feels they have all the time in the world.

Gradually, you will return to yourself,

Having learned a new respect for your heart

And the joy that dwells far within slow time.

Learning Love Through Travel in Florence

Short, but sweet

A pidgeon’s beauty shot

Remember to experience travel

Short, but sweet

 I need to start by disclosing that our time in Firenze (Florence) was extremely short due to our train times-not to say the short lived stay in Firenze did not offer an experience-just a very limited experience. It was a pretty popular theme: rushed and fast paced, but we made the best of it with the opportunity we had. We, of course, could have removed the city from the itinerary, but we had wanted to experience numerous Italian cities in our exploration.

On a positive note, for two travelers with minimal time, Firenze was optimal. The train station is deep within the downtown, so when you emerge, you find yourself already engulfed by the city. The morning sun was just retiring as the midday warmth was awakening creating a delightful brisk walk to the hostel. To admit, I was envious of other travelers embarking towards their accommodations knowing they had longer intentions of stay.

The sun weaved onto the architecture of the buildings, which to articulate, are patterns integrated onto the walls, doors, and windows. As a quicker observation, it may look like color, but in deeper reflection, it is the shadows that are guarding each brick creating an intricate design.  

Arriving at the steps and gateway of the Plus Hostel, it was umbrellaed with flags from various countries. There was an efficiency aspect to the hostel which was not surprising based on the rather grand size, but the hostel was what any traveler within a budget needs: rooftop lounging, outdoor pool during summer, laundry facilities, community showers, and bunking options to your privacy level. To its’ credit, the hostel had some beautifully designed rooftop lounging with various roof patio seating including hammocks and large potted plants. Although it was only early April-the kickoff of the tourist season-the hostel took into consideration the Firenze heat that was sure to arrive in the summer.

Our private room with a private bathroom including shower was very budget friendly with high standards of cleanliness. To our surprise, even the double window opened to a horizon view of the city. For sure a high recommendation. If you are lucky, you may even have the opportunity to participate in an optional fire drill in the morning, which was scheduled the following morning. Sadly, we were unable to RSVP due to our planned early morning train, but I do not think either of us were terribly upset by that.

After taking a quick refresh, we set off into the city.

A pigeon’s beauty shot

Missing some of the warmer weather from earlier in the trip, we decided to try to take advantage of the sunny weather with the light Hawaiian button shirts we brought with us. I cannot say it is surprising that we compliment each other’s vibrancy through the watermelon and flamingo patterned shirts, but it is a surprise when in one of Italy’s most historic cities where fashion is expected. Never the less, we strolled into the urban area of the city on the search for beautiful water which in Firenze, is the Arno River.

The Arno River is lined with bright, colorful architecture as if assembled around the thousands of windows located on the buildings as well as the bridge. What I did not understand is why the walls were so high barricading people from admiring the water at various points. Near the bridge, there was opportunity to view the water, but only from a higher spot. With the beautiful sun setting, we were still able to stretch on our tiptoes to see over or hop onto the wall. It was ideal time for some photography. Just a few pictures in attempting to capture the sun highlighting the yellow and blues of the walls when a pigeon flew down onto the wall just arms length away. Now, I love birds, so the idea that a pigeon wanted a closeup beauty shot had me shocked and elated. It was this moment where I adopted the nickname ‘Pidge’.

Remember to experience travel

We began to meander our way back through the city to Florence Cathedral called ‘Cattedrale di Santa Maria del Fiore’. The epicness of the size was hard to comprehend. Each way you look, you see the bold outlines stretch further. The vastness of the building reached into the endlessness of the blue sky leaving you in wonder of height and depth between the two. Glancing around, you notice various street artists with beautiful pieces hung for sale. Then you notice the other tourists. Some in groups snapping quick pictures and some in a purposeful pauses of admiration. Both had someone voicing facts that most likely won’t be heard or remembered.

If you pay attention long enough though, you notice the boredom painted on so many faces. It felt like so many were acting the playwright: walking the tour, hearing-but not listening to the guide, and capturing routine pictures. Did they actually want to go on that walking tour? Guided tours, in general, are common in most tourism dominant cities which can be great ways to see iconic scenery, but if you do not like history, might not be the best option for you. Or if you do not like a scheduled plan made for you, also a tour might not be for you. But if you maybe only are comfortable on a tour, then maybe it is ideal for you. Not to narrow that guided tours are the only kind of decision that needs to be made when traveling, but each decision impacts your experience especially allowing others to plan your time for you.

On reflection on myself, I personally am not favorable to guided tours. I have done an intriguing Ghost tour in Chicago back in my teens I still partially remember, but I also remember time waiting on the bus, watching others on the bus taking pictures, and wondering when we would head back to the meeting point. And for me, that has always stuck with me. Why would I want to have those thoughts while ever traveling? That, honestly, seemed so sad to me that something that I was supposed to be fully immersed in and I am wondering when it will end.

I do not wish on anyone to ever be bored while traveling. You have new places, people, food, and culture around you to learn and connect with. 

Firenze offered a constant reflective theme: Pleasure. With limited expectations and open opportunity, we travel with the goal to just enjoy where and who you are. Reflecting still on our earliest travels, it was one of the biggest aspects we connected over. Traveling does not have to seem like a scheduled routine-it can be a liberating enjoyment of exploration with no itinerary. Invite yourself to get lost. Give yourself opportunity to experience. And allow yourself to just be.